Let’s give this a shot.
I write to you from my phone, connecting through the hotel’s spotty wifi. If you’re reading this, a miracle has occurred.
Currently I am lounging on our hotel terrace in Positano, sunburned and resting after a day spent exploring the island of Capri. I’ve got a glass of wine, and I’m basically as content as a human can be.
To help you set the scene, I have attached a photo of the view from our hotel room (maybe? I have no idea how any of this is going to work). It is designed to be cruel and make you jealous, SORRY. I never pretended to be a good person.
Anyway, how are you doing? Well, I hope. Good to see you haven’t broken the blog while I’ve been away. Do not fear, a MASSIVE post-Italy recap is planned. Too much insane stuff has already happened. (Teaser: A man, looking not unlike Ron Jeremy, may have propositioned me at a bar on the first night. The line, “I’ll get a hotel room and give you the night of your life,” was spoken.)
But for now, I have to go to dinner, and then to what promises to be the cheesiest club in Europe. I hope you are well, even if I have no idea who you are.